No Argument From Me
To be a country Doc you need to be fluent in several languages.
I had a patient today who said they gave him some Aurgumintin (Augmentin) at the ‘mergency room and it give him the back door trots. (diarrhea)
He got no argument from me. I’ve seen it cause that before. I just hope he doesn’t have see difficult super memory co-itis dysentery. (C. difficile pseudomembranous colitis.)
Dr. B
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Dr. Tom Bibey: Stories of the Bluegrass Music Road 
May 19, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Heh. I sometimes feel like I’m a translator, too – I get “persecuted” for “prosecuted,” “scarred” for “scared,” and “defiantly” for “definitely” all the time…
May 19, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Lawd, Lawd, mrschili. I hope you don’t get too many bluegrassers in your class. It might get to be too much.
Dr. B
May 19, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Oh my word. How do you remember all that stuff?
Mrschili should know that in a previous life, I was a defender of the proper use of homophones. 🙂
May 19, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Well Doc, sometimes I get the gangsta talk. Usually I can figure out what they are saying but sometimes I have to ask. And when they are not listening to me I give ’em gangsta right back. That makes ’em pay attention. After they are done laughing at the little white chick from the sticks trying to talk like a home boy.. What up dawg!
May 19, 2008 at 7:32 pm
mrspande,
I set a lot of it to music.
Example: sing idiopathic hypertrophic subaortic stenosis to the tune of
supercalafragalisticexpealidocius.
See- I told you guys from the start it takes an odd mind to be both a doctor and a musician.
Dr. B
May 19, 2008 at 7:36 pm
hey whodo,
Bluegrass talk can be strange too.
Example: Q: “Can he cut the gig?”
A: “SHABA.” (at least if said with a frown)
The question would mean can the guy play, and the answer is no.
It took me as long to learn bluegrass speak as medical.
Dr. B
May 19, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Funny!
Once a man came in to pick up his script in a pharmacy where my DH worked. While DH rang it up, the man picked up the sack and shook it.
“They don’t sound like the pills I usually get,” the old man grouched.
DH answered, “When I was in school, they taught us to look at the pills to tell what they were. Not to listen to them.”
The old guy opened the vial. “Yup. They’re right.”
Susan
May 19, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Ms. Susan,
Lordy, in the world of medicine!
I heard about one pharmacist who counseled the patient not to worry- the pills were real small, but they were they right ones.
The patient came back after a while and said he knew they wuz small, but he just couldn’t see them a’tall.
Turns out the pharmacist had not put them in the bottle.
I have absolute trust of that pharmacist ’cause he told the story on himself.
Dr. B
May 20, 2008 at 5:05 pm
How funny! I think I might have met that pharmacist. My dh is one of those anal pharmacists who checks and double checks to be sure he doesn’t make that kind of mistake. (Probably has an ulcer from all the angst.)
Susan
May 20, 2008 at 5:26 pm
These days you have to double check. This case was back when I was in high school. I never forgot it and spent my life about half paranoid- probably had a few ulcers too.
Dr. B
May 27, 2008 at 10:56 pm
ROFL… oh God… when I was in England, I used to have a housekeeper who yelled at me for walking around barefoot. When I asked her what the problem was, she replied that I would get “Piles”. It took me forever to figure out what it was that she meant. For some reason, she thought I would get hemorroids from walking in my bare feet…. go figure!
May 28, 2008 at 4:40 am
Amber,
I have been around medicine a long time and have heard of the piles but never heard of getting ’em from walkng barefoot.
As a Doc, there is something new every day.
Dr. B